Confessions of a Thinkaholic


We can’t be friends because you’re a guy and I’m a girl?

It’s a new year – Hurray! What does it mean that it’s a new year? For me, it’s really just that January 1 is the day after December 31 but we all need a reason to celebrate I suppose 😀

Thus far the new year has been kind to me. I haven’t been to work yet; I’ve downloaded some new music and eaten some good food. Can a girl ask for anything more? Of course she can, but that’s another blog post 😉 …

So in this post I’d like to explore the topic of opposite sex friendships. Is there such a thing? A lot of people say “No” but I say, “Yes”.

The majority of guys that I meet and have no interest in always resort to the “friend” option. I guess the reasoning is that if we become friends then eventually we’ll become lovers??? Not sure, but guys just knock it off with the, “Can we be friends?” spiel because it’s not gonna happen. Take the L and move on.

I have male friends and these guys are just friends. There’s no benefit to our friendship other than the occasional phone conversation/text message. It’s easy for me to just be friends with a guy because I’m not scared or concerned that it’s going to develop into something more than a friendship unless I want it to. I think a lot of people believe that if there’s an attraction on behalf of one person then it’s not a true friendship. I beg to differ. While one person having an attraction may make things a little more complex, there is still the ability to have a platonic friendship. It all boils down to respect AND self-control. My male friends respect me and if they have an attraction they keep it clean and classy. I’m not saying I’m naïve but there are boundaries in my friendships and as long as you don’t cross them, we’re cool.


Things My Mom Says

My mom says the craziest things to the people who she holds near and dear – her children. I can recall from an early age some of the things she would say and I thought it was normal for everyone’s mom to speak to them recklessly. Obviously at the time I didn’t know it was reckless, I just knew that I didn’t want to cross her because I believed she’d do what she said. Without further adieu I give you some of my mom’s favorite things to say:

“I should kick yuh in yuh damn throat.”

This one leaves nothing to the imagination lol. Mom says this when one of her children has taken their nonsense too far.

“Horse dead and cow fat.”

This is a typical Jamaican saying to indicate that something isn’t quite right with the story being told to you.

“Yuh mussi tink mi deh with Con Ed.”

This was a warning to turn off the lights because no, contrary to popular belief mom was not in a relationship with Con Edison.

“Yuh father is not a glass maker.”

My mom’s inquiry to why you would be standing in the way. You’re not see through…


Ummm, my mom is way too old to say this but this is a result of her having too much exposure to my teenage sisters Lol. She uses this one at every opportunity. When she’s trying to tell me a story I’ve heard a gazillion times and I decline to hear it for the gazillionth and one time, she calls me a “Hater!”

When I tell her that there is no way she should go outside in some mismatched outfit that has 1960 written all over it she accuses me, “Hater.” Ok mom, I’m a hater – now go change that outfit!


Apparently my mother is under the impression that she is the only real smart family member in the family. Make a mistake or if you don’t get her oftentimes dubious Jamaican mom logic, you are accused of being a genius when of course she means the exact opposite.

“I will murder you cold blooded and premeditated.”

This is something Mom says to my sisters. I suspect that she’s only partially joking. This statement is an updated version of what Mom used to tell me and my brothers when we were younger. When I was kid, she used to say “I will throw uno over de bridge and get away with it, no questions asked.” Translation: I will throw the 4 of you over the bridge and find a plausible explanation to give to the authorities. Really Mom? Really…

“Nuh mek me shove it down yuh throat.”

If this sounds like a threat to you, you’ve accurately assessed the gravity of the statement. Mom says this when she’s trying to make one of her children drink some godforsaken medicine that she’s concocted from the roots and bushes of Jamaica. If you take too long or squish up your face when she’s offered you some of this um medicine, you’re sure to be faced with this threat and action.

“We should have our own show and I’m dead serious.”

This notion comes from watching too many reality TV shows and a hidden desire to get famous. No Mom, we should not have our own show, you’re too vulgar for TV…

Last but not least…

“Don’t make me reel off the clots dem!”

The clots she’s referring to are “bloodclot, rasclot, bumboclot (and the most vulgar clot of them all) pussyclot”. These words are some of the worst expletives in patois so if you really want to scare your children practice reeling these off to them when they are toddlers. Mom reels off the “clots” when she’s reached her breaking point which is everyday at least once a day. It doesn’t take much for her to reel off the clots.

Special thanks to thepilgrimfancy and his post on things his father says – click here to laugh!


Words are so important. But more important than words or equally important is the action accompanying the words. I say this because I realize and have been realizing that people really expect things from you and you don’t even know it. Everyone perceives things so differently. The same thing happens to two people at the same time and each walks away sometimes with opposing views on the situation. There’s nothing wrong with that. The problem lies in whether the disconnect is addressed. How can you know there’s a difference of opinion if nothing is said? I think communication is taken for granted a lot of the time. You’ve got your talkers and your listeners. And each becomes comfortable in their role. And if you’re a talker who never listens to the listener, how do you know that the listener doesn’t have something they need to say? And it’s not enough to just have a discussion; you have to do something with the newfound knowledge or understanding that you’ve gained from the discussion. People are something else with their needs and wants, and subsequent accusations, hurt and disappointment when their needs and wants are not met…


It’s just Tuesday, still early in the week. This week I’m feeling kinda good and hopeful. I’ve upheld some personal standards and I’ve been spontaneous and I like it. Normally I’m on the straight and narrow path and unwilling to be too risqué for fear that my actions will come crashing down and the consequences will be dire. As of late I’ve thrown caution to the wind and doing what feels nice even though it may not be the smartest thing to do. I’ve only one life to live, I have to live it.

It’s Tuesday and I’ve cheated on my diet…technically Saturday was my cheat day but it’s hard for me when I’m at work. I ate half of a personal pizza but something had to give! I was hungry and pizza was the safest choice. I don’t even care for pizza much anymore but all the things you can’t have you want and so pizza it was.

It’s Tuesday but I’m thinking about the date I went out on Friday. My rainy, Friday night date was one of the best dates I’ve had in a very long time. It’s amazing what a man with a sense of humor, a little sensitivity and thoughtfulness can do for the soul. Mmmm…it feels nice to have a tangible experience to hold onto, to help me remain optimistic about the whole dating scene.

It’s Tuesday but I’m already looking forward to this Friday and my 3 day weekend. No solid plans yet but I’m going to enjoy it somehow after all the chores and errands are complete.

It’s Tuesday and I’ve burnt my grilled chicken that I made for my salad. One of the perks of cooking for one is that I don’t have to care about it being burnt. I’m going to eat it anyway Lol…

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